2 Corinthians 12:9-11 New International Version (NIV)
9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delightin weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Arguments galore, “jokes” taken personally, little things defeated me ... I’d hit the bitter bottom and when asked why, I couldn’t honestly tell you. I had no clue why I felt so utterly useless, worthless and like a downright failure. I felt I had failed at being a good employee, a wife, daughter/granddaughter, sister and friend. Shoot, I felt I had failed at being a human ... everything I touched seemed to turn to mud and nothing made it better. I had failed at life and I was ready to just sit in my pitty puddle and wade with the ducks.
But then I realized:
I’d been given some new projects at work that required a new idea and mindset in the world of design. I’m a self-taught graphic designer and still very much a newbie - I felt entirely inadequate for these jobs yet I know my employers have full faith in me.
The cleanliness of my home is a CONSTANT battle (especially with three dogs - but man do we love our “girls”) I felt a wife should always have a clean home, laundry done and dinner in the table by the time he gets home ( I was raised Old-School and I actually enjoy doing those things ... when I’m not exhausted)... but I rarely have the energy or motivation to stay on top of the things like I wish I could.
“Would you want to hang out?” .... no, thanks; I hear my couch and a long nap calling my name. Shouldn’t I be spending more time with my friends so that they don’t start to think I dislike them?
Should I eat that third sugar cookie, loaded with frosting? No! Am I going to anyways? Duh. Self-control is for the weak ........like me. Man, I want to be better but MAN do I love food and HATE sweating. That and I have chronic pain so that kind of kills motivation.
But God never lets me sulks for long ... ever. Lol. No long pitty puddle parties for me - no! He keeps reminding me that I’m special, especially made, and exceptionally created for His purpose and only I can accomplish what He set forth for me.
This doesn’t mean I don’t struggle; this doesn’t mean I don’t have to continuously remind myself that it’s only through His strength that’ll I’m accomplish what I need to and more. This means that I have something to remind myself with; remind myself that I’m not tackling this life, these changes, alone. I have His strength supporting me, hands behind me, ready to catch me when I inevitably fail, only to lift me back to my feet so I can just try, try again.
Don’t give up because it’s difficult - just put your trust in someone outside yourself, someone who holds ALL the strength.
